i suspect AAVE is African-Americans’ revenge for slavery, which is probably justified

THE TITLE SHADOW ON THE MAIN MENU

the water is wide

[Achievement Unlocked] Still Being a Little Bitch

2am cereal but not because i want it

happenis

non-binariO

what a fabolous evenign wir will have

mabel syrup

toilet paper but each square contains a unique AI-generated paragraph and accompanying image guilt-tripping you into using less paper

each dawn breaks not believing

i’d answer the question “what’s your type?” honestly but that would require me to just say a person’s name and that feels maybe terrifying

FOSS Neratu

sometimes i remember that there are people in the world who know the name for the standard size of milk bottle lid. i want that knowledge

just urinated at approx. 300 PSI. i think this is a useful skill to have as we enter the new year

“oh you’re just sitting there doing nothing” excuse you i am THINKING, ACTUALLY, it’s like dreaming except it hurts more

as usual, i don’t know if i’ll wake up tomorrow, but i sure as hell have made plans anyway

i need to stop doing stupid things in dreams. i do enough of that irl

NEW WEBSITE IS FINALLY LIVE WOOOOOOOO

RIP iOS 6, you would have loved logging in to iCloud ;(