you know how sometimes you see someone in public who's just so obviously high but they're trying so hard to hide it???? that's me

made both a very bad and a very good decision today so i think it probably evens out in the grand scheme

INTENTIONAL CONFLICT FOR INTENTIONAL GROWTH

split an e bomb with my manager and reorganized the entire walk in freezer *kisses my biceps*

i read a 700 page fiction book today :0

loud by accident, quiet on purpose

*jimmy urine voice* jesus christ almighty

not a door mat, but a door prize

appropriately grimey

been sitting w/ my thoughts recently (but also my thots lol)

money solves everything stop lying to us

"a computer with a quiet yearning"

SOMETHING !!!!!! IS !!!!! ABOUT !!!!!! TO !!!!! HAPPEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!

a weight has been lifted off my shoulders and a breeze is wafting thru my soul

i just yawned while throwing up??? why can the body even perform that function????

It Happened To Me! : Taylor Swift Ruined My Relationship

it takes just as much creativity to be mean as it does to be nice

just wanna be the kind of old person where people are like "damn i wanna be that person when I'm old"

"you are adept at weaponizing incompetence"

LOVVVVEEEEEEEEEE referring to any of my girlfriends as "one of my girlfriends" it makes me feel Unstoppable 😈