“i know it’s an inconvenience for you, but it’s a double win for me, so it’s kinda still a win-win situation”

shirt tags hate to see me grab the seam ripper

you ever smell something so intoxicating that you understand the idea of aphrodisiacs?

when am i gonna meat a millionaires son? im bored of being the rare one

I love exercise bands!!

BREAK NECKS, IM THE CHIROPRACTOR — CALM DOWN, YOU KNOW I GOTCHA

my dream is to try every fruit and meat this world has to offer me

I did soooooooooo much today, but ☝🏻 i also have homemade blackberry syrup now

just drank 3 cups of black tea and feel like someone performed necromancy on me

Just remember that whatever you’re doing, someone has done it worse, and an overconfident man has done it with no experience

aaaaaa i;m so forgetful lately. i dont like it >:(

Judge matters by merit, judge action by its timing

Its a fine line between inspiring curiosity or being one

I JUST HAD THE BEST **** !!!

Don’t mind me, just passing through

If you live in the US I truly cannot recommend petit pot puddings enough

I LOVE BEING DESENSITIZED TO THE DUMB SHIT PEOPLE SAY!

Too freaky for the mainstream, too mainstream for the freaks

“the light won’t save me so let the anthropocene watch me GOING FUCKING CRAZY“

Next time you want to fight people online, open Nextdoor and report a local Republican instead