google jury nullification

sometimes i wish my perfect tits weren’t such gorgeous juicy doubles so people wondered about my gender more

*talking to myself in the mirror* if you want to have sex you have to reply to messages

to be (post nudes on tumblr) or not to be (not post nudes on tumblr), that is the question

“agree to disagree” i’m going to fight you until you admit i’m right. we can take as long as you need but i get to punch you the whole time.

me, at 10:42 pm, texting **** for the fourteenth time: TEXT ME BACK I WANT TO TALK ABOUT MY ARTISTIC OPINION

“i would die for my neighbors” brother, you won’t even wear a mask

avenue q puppets but they’re operated by just one person doing the entirety of the prologue from into the woods send tweet

one of those days where i’m glad i have things i’m actively looking forward to so i don’t want to [redacted] [redacted]

help, people at the function have the wrong opinions about amish culture

at my legal CS job on hold with someone at their insurance CS job on hold with someone at their hospital CS job. russian nesting doll holds.

green day really just wrote the american idiot album ??? like holy shit what a masterpiece no notes

the grief and the grief and the grief and the grief and the grief and the grief and the grief and the grief and the grief and the grief and

i cannot believe LMM followed up in the heights with hamilton *insert we were all rooting for you meme*

no babe the lil wayne stays ON during sex

spotify wrapped but it’s just how many times i watched the social network this year

i will never be the best, the worst, or the weirdest dressed at the grocery store i love living in a city

sometimes i think about how annoying my singing must be to my neighbors but i AM a very good singer so it’s a mixed bag for sure

every single ad i get is for generic/off-brand ozempic and it’s really starting to get to me ngl

america’s next top model reboot where it’s still tyra banks but the models are just all the kardashians

it’s okay i’m going to be honest and brave and i will survive this doctor’s appointment