"if you think about it, standing up isn't that different from sitting down" —my brain trying to convince me to move

i love my wife so much

i've been craving so much water i can only assume my body got used to being hydrated when i had to glug it last week

imagine being so unreasonable

my blorbos orbiting me

but clanker is cuter

gruntilda is still cute honestly

i am SO full of AMAZING FOOD. and i am no longer a danger to society!

i feel like a joke sometimes

yay !! yay !! tomorrow !!

i already hate thinking about it.

if a rat in a hat could cook real good

considering buying a cat toy. for myself

why does simply lemonade kill my stomach but i can drink a fuckton of fast food lemonade and have no problems

i have got to make every day count.

choked down a banana

my switch has accidentally been on for 2 days? and it's still at 61%?

i have got to drunk night sword

cold and eating peanuts

they call me Big Gulper because i didn't realize i drank more than 16 cups of water yesterday