youre telling me he jacked off all trades

darkness cannot survive in the presence of light. now put THAT between 2 buns & eat it!

soort vibrator in een fleshlight verhaal dit. ergens toch wel poetisch.

home depot left SCRAMBLING after customers discover this new gadget...

the first food to be committing stolen valor...

so i FUX YO BITCH in da clicky clank

sometimes you wait a little while

20 geoguessr pros go hawaii on idaho

i don't care if you think i'm a fool cause everyone else thinks i'm supercool

feel like getting murdered in a dark scary alley in Mtl in 2 weeks?

my school library still has reindeer decorations on. its the spirit that counts really. never let yourself be controlled by a calendar

"how dyou keep the weight off?" people always ask the stupidest stuff! "how dyou keep the weight off?" how bout i dont wanna talk about it!

love will tear us apart. again

men will chase after alternative girls but 70% of the time we don't even have eyebrows. go chase after our eyebrow hairs

I'm big and bald myself and I've had my share of lesbians and threesomes so I can relate.

get off The Cross, ladykins... we could use the wood!

what a fuckin day

oh, sienna, would've been cute

you gonna cancel me yeah genzimibra

'cause if you were a girl i wouldn't really care, i wish you were a girl, i hate what i just said