n he'll say im picking my friend over him, but no, im just not isolating myself when he doesnt act right

after months of being ignored over a game, insulted abt things i apologized profusely for, im pretty much over it idk

+he tells me 2 stop playing w/friends bc he dislikes them. but he doesnt do anything w me either. ig im supposed to be friendless+wait 4ever

whats the point of having a boyfriend when they pick video games over you constantly. we could play together but he prefers ignoring me 24/7

went a bit too crazy on the bangs now theyre horribly short

starting tmrw, no more emotional dependency and gonna lose the 35 lbs ive been meaning to lose. want my life to be better

im actually so pathetic

i get so many dizzy spells these days and idk why!!! im going to the doctor next friday for my arm and a derm referral, maybe ill ask then

why cant i be a normal person who can let things go

he was clear he was done with me. wish i wasnt such a horrible person. my friends ask me to play so i may as well since i got nothing left

i feel so hungry n nauseous but i legit just ate like 2 hours ago whats wrong w me

anyways time to stress-eat cry and watch more law and order ...?

and like he said lets forget abt everything and start fresh which id love to do but i couldnt get past that he didnt rly care if i stayed :(

blocked him...hurts my heart deeply but its for the best. we were 15 days away from another year together. gotta just forget everything now

my stomach hurts all the time these days why do i have to have a body

i need a new laptop but no ones hiring kill me nowwww

im addicted to watching law & order

been using computers+online social spaces as an escapism since i was like 5 (2008), now im tired of always being available & around ppl

i miss him sm but i think i just miss who he used to be mixed in with the hope he'll go back to "normal"

only one thing would fix it all but its been almost a week and nothing's happened so...ig its not