Why waste life stressing over Internet strangers when you could be drinking BOURBON WITH FRIENDS! From now on? I’m all-in on SOCIAL DRINKING

Iseul’s makin’ fun of me for gettin’ a wine named after crab juice, but if it tastes good, it tastes good—

My place needs dimmer, warmer lights in the kitchen! When I cook in dark nights like these, I don’t need to cook my RETINAS, too.

Every single printer and mail machine in this law firm stole my lunch break. Upside is that I get to see Garrett again tomorrow. Cool tech!

One of these days we’ll have to finish that alien landscape. I don’t know WHEN or IF I’ll want to paint after that. Think I might write…

The Himalayan salt lamp has got to be one of mom’s best gifts to me. The campfire orange glow brings in the coziness on icy, winter nights.

Fiancée: “I think I’ve become hypersensitive to people being stupid because of you.” AHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (Context is baking.)

Tresorit sounds great on paper but it’s broken as shit. I’ll eat my head before I ever use it again.

Fiancée went to her local book club and was disappointed to find it was all horny women talking about their favourite smut rofl

It should be a crime to stop selling winter teas in January WHEN WINTER GOES INTO MARCH IN MINNESOTA—I'm looking at YOU, REPUBLIC OF TEA!!!

Sent the marine biologist fiancée Yaen’s “fish fight”. Nerd. She’s asking why I have this keh https://youtu.be/dD8o2lNolM0

Oh, yeah, today is warmer than tomorrow will be. And it’s -5°F/-20.5°C right now. I’m gonna have to wear mittens INDOORS.

You watch ONE JonTron video and now I’ve read about Animorphs on the TV Tropes site. Lying in bed recovering now, oooogh…

Steadily regaining control over my right leg. Balance is better… But it’s crazy I STILL dance better than the average Minnesotan. PATHETIC!!

I’m sorry, since when are Czech and Thai considered “rare and distinguished languages”? All right Cornell…

IN THE END, I had another zombie dream. But this one was nice. I got to hang out at the mall with some elegant older ladies. Best nails!

Reading up on demographic research. Hoooo boy.

Values an’ allegiances an’ where I want to raise my family are all swirling in my mind. Looking seriously into triple citizenship…

Bars are awesome. My local co-op brewery an’ bar is hosting an “Ales & ASL” class to teach American Sign Language—with beer!

Why the fuck is Facebook advertising events to me in Chicago lmao. I’m not going to Chicago tonight. No.