planning my funeral and my suicide instead of my birthday. there is something wrong but i’m leaning into it instead of running away from it

the perfume of love cannot be concealed

haha .. yes. he wants nothing to do with me…. yes. accept it. accept it already.

this is a love that i never knew...

i wish i could hold him and show him how loved he is. "𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘭𝘪𝘱𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘪 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦"

everything always goes wrong. all of it is so stupid . so wrong. i hate this. why can't it ever go right

why do i ALWAYS want the people who want nothing to do with me and who could literally care less about me. HE WANTS NOTHING TO DO WITH ME!!!

"stop loving me" why "bc i said so!" . it just doesn't work like that sorry

holy fuck dude i just spent the whole day volunteering and my back is KILLING me

i had nightmares all night. i was at least able to successfully force myself awake to make them stop and console myself. i don't feel good.

i miss him so fucking much

stripped down to my bra, then i jumped, water lit me up with goosebumps; swam til my hands had no meaning, waited on your text to fuck me up

my city got torn apart by tornadoes yesterday. i'm heartbroken :(

i don't want optimism!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tired of crying every night, tired of missing him, tired of it hurting, when will it end, i don't think it will

remind me never to trust any man ever again lmfao

the sun is out and the breeze is comforting

i'm not going to the hospital. i want to die. stop telling me to go. leave me alone

i'm struggling to find a reason not to jump in; everything that i love will die, is that the lesson?

there's a first for everything! today, my anxiety made me sick! i love being miserable!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!